A king of infinite space
by Miko Akako
Summary: Kurt auditions for a community theater to bulk up his application where he'll learn exactly what - and who - he's willing to give up for his dream. Read warnings/spoilers inside.
1. Chapter 1

**Story**: A king of infinite space  
><strong>Author<strong>: MikoAkako  
><strong>Beta<strong>: None  
><strong>Rating<strong>: R (eventually)  
><strong>Warnings<strong>: Dub-Con/Non-Con, Emotional Abuse  
><strong>Word count<strong>: 1,282  
><strong>Disclaimer<strong>: I don't own anything you recognize.  
><strong>Summary<strong>: Kurt auditions for a community theater to bulk up his application where he'll learn exactly what - and who - he's willing to give up for his dream.

**SPOILERS THROUGH 3x03**

* * *

><p>Kurt looked around at the other people sitting in the auditorium. There were only a handful of people left, dwindled down from the full house that had turned out that morning. The woman on stage belted out a song that was so indistinguishable Kurt couldn't understand a single word. When she left the stage a few minutes later, he pulled out his phone to check the time.<p>

He ignored the texts from Blaine, pushing down the stirrings of guilt. He loved Blaine, but he couldn't afford to be distracted right now. Blaine had won Tony and Kurt meant every word of congratulations. And that was why he made the two hour drive from Lima to Columbus to try out for the community theatre.

"Kurt Hummel?" He almost jumped out of his seat when his name was called. Even though the audience was down to only three people, he felt his stomach toss as he walked to center stage.

From his seat in the auditorium, he hadn't been able to get a good look at the director, Wesley Byres, before he was facing out into the audience. He was a handsome man with a build that reminded Kurt faintly of Jesse St. James. This man, however, was blonde and his hair was long, pulled back in a pony tail. Overall, he looked like he should be on the stage instead of directing.

"I'm Kurt Hummel, auditioning for the role of Jesus Christ." He took a breath and tried to calm himself. He put the image of people laughing at him to the back of his mind. He put his failures away. He could do this. He was Kurt freaking Hummel, and he was brilliant. "I'll be singing 'As Long as He Needs Me' from Oliver!."

"Very well." The director sounded bored, not even looking up from his clipboard. Kurt closed his eyes, channeling the heartbreak of Nancy before opening his mouth and singing. His audition is the complete antithesis of his audition for West Side Story. He's less focused on theatricality and more on pouring emotion out through his words. He doesn't have any choreography planned, though he walked slowly along the stage.

When he finished, he let the final note hang for a moment before relaxing and letting his eyes find the director. The man was looking up at him with a calculating expression. The sound of applause could be heard from the few people watching. Kurt waited, expectant, for the praise he knew he deserved. When the man did speak, his tone was no longer bored, but it certainly wasn't as enthusiastic as Kurt was hoping. "Stick around– Kurt, was it?" Kurt nodded. "Very good. Brian Narin?"

Kurt withdrew from the stage, leaving the auditorium as the next man – Brian – began singing. He was still a little out of breath and the nerves for what the director could possible want were just starting to hit. He pulled out his phone and dialed home.

"Hey Kurt." Finn answered on the first wring.

"Hello, Finn. Could you let my dad know the auditions are running long and I won't be home for dinner?"

"Uh…sure, dude." Kurt gritted his teeth – he hated when Finn called him that, but it was pointless to remind Finn of that. "You want to talk to him?" He heard Puck's voice in the background.

"No. Just get back to whatever crude and violent video game you and Puck are playing." Finn said goodbye and the line went dead.

Kurt snuck back in just in time for the last performer to finish up her song and the director to dismiss her. He thought the man had forgotten about him when he turned around. "You asked me to wait?"

"Let's go to my office." Kurt followed him down the hall and in to what looked like a supply closet someone had shoved a desk in. The man set his stack of papers in, taking one out that Kurt recognized as his resume. It was pathetically short, and he felt embarrassed.

"Mr. Byres…" Kurt began after a moment of silence.

"Call me Wesley, please, Kurt." He gestured a hand to the empty chair across the desk. Kurt took a seat, crossing his legs and resting his hands on his legs so they wouldn't shake and betray his nerves.

"I see here you just had a birthday."

Kurt was confused what that had to do with his audition, but nodded. "Yeah, I just turned eighteen."

"Congratulations. That's a big one." Wesley set his paper down on the desk and leaned forward. "I have to admit, when you told me what you would be singing I had my doubts. 'As Long as He Needs Me' was performed by Patty LuPone and Judy Garland, among others. But I think you did it justice."

"Thank you!" Kurt was shocked. From the immediate reaction he hadn't expected to be given such high praise.

"And I'd love to give you the part, but Jesus is the lead, and frankly, you're past experience is…Well – nonexistent." The man looked genuinely sorry, and at Kurt's fallen expression he stood up and walked around, placing a comforting hand on Kurt's shoulder.

"Please. I need the part for my college application." He would not cry. He would get the part. "I'd do anything for this chance."

"I would be sticking my neck out if I gave you the part, Kurt." His hand withdrew and Kurt felt cut off, somehow. He could feel his last chance slip away. And what was worse was that it was so close. It was like the Wesley was dangling it right in front of him, but he would never catch it.

"I'll do anything you want," He said frantically. "Acting classes. Singing classes. I…I'm in my school's Glee club, but I could miss practice if you wanted me to come to extra practices." God, he hated how pathetic he sounded, but he couldn't handle being stuck in Lima for one second longer than he had to.

"Anything is a very big promise to make, Kurt," Wesley said with a smile that chilled Kurt. He considered leaving, but he couldn't. All the community theatres in driving distance were done casting for their Winter production except this one and it would be too late if he had to wait for Spring. "But there is _something_ you could do for me."

"Please," Kurt pleaded.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Kurt recoiled. Surely he wasn't suggesting what Kurt thought he was. Kurt could leave right then. He could get up and be out the door before the man had any idea what was going on. Kurt could walk away and go…go where? Back to Lima for eternity?

"Uh…I do," He admitted.

"Do you have plans this Friday at 8?" Kurt closed his eyes, glad Wesley was still standing behind him and couldn't see the conflicted emotions pass across his face.

"He's going out of town this weekend with his parents." It wasn't even a lie – one of Blaine's uncles had passed away a few days ago and the memorial and funeral were next weekend.

"I think we can work out an arrangement. Meet me back here this Friday. If you show up, I'll know you're serious about pursuing a career in acting." He paused, taking the time to walk back to his seat behind the desk. "I'm very connected in the theatre world, Kurt. I can give a call to my friends in New York – I'm assuming that's your dream –" Kurt just nodded. "And tell them all about you. But words can be good or bad, sweetheart."

"I understand." Kurt stood up, recognizing a dismissal when he heard one.

"Goodbye, Kurt."


	2. Chapter 2

**Story**: A king of infinite space  
><strong>Author<strong>: MikoAkako  
><strong>Beta<strong>: None  
><strong>Rating<strong>(this chapter): R  
><strong>Warnings<strong>: Dub-Con/Non-Con, Emotional Abuse  
><strong>Word count<strong>: 2,026  
><strong>Disclaimer<strong>: I don't own anything you recognize.  
><strong>Summary<strong>: Kurt auditions for a community theater to bulk up his application where he'll learn exactly what - and who - he's willing to give up for his dream.

**SPOILERS THROUGH 3x03**

* * *

><p>The decision was hovering over Kurt's head all week. He didn't tell anyone about it, though he considered confessing to Blaine several times. The only problem was every time he thought about Blaine his thoughts went to West Side Story and then to New York.<p>

It was ridiculous he was even considering Wesley's proposition. He'd read stories of actors and actresses sleeping their way to the top, but he never thought he would be one of those people. His assumption had always been that they weren't talented and that they needed the 'extra help.' He always thought he could stand on his own natural talent.

He was Kurt Hummel, and he didn't need to sleep with anyone to get time on a stage. If he had to do a year at a state school before going to New York, it wouldn't be the end of the world. He could stay close to Blaine and then they could go away together. They would work through their problems and get that happy ending they both dreamed of.

It was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders as he walked in to school on Friday morning. He had been dreading the day all week, knowing it was the deadline for his decision. His good mood must have been obvious because Blaine noticed right away.

"You look awfully happy today," He said, glancing up and down the hall before kissing Kurt's cheek in their customary greeting in front of Kurt's locker.

"That's because I am." Kurt was practically bouncing on the balls of his feet as he grabbed the books he needed from his locker. At least, he was happy until he reached over for Blaine's hand. Blaine slid his hand away, pretending he didn't notice.

"So I know I have to leave today after school, but there's just enough time for a quick date at the Lima Bean." Normally Kurt would jump at the opportunity to spend time with Blaine, but not today. He clenched his empty hand and stopped in the middle of the hall. His boyfriend turned back, a question in his eye.

"No, Blaine. I don't want to meet you at the Lima Bean," His voice was raised and Blaine's glances around only served to fuel his anger. "You still won't even hold my hand. And I see the way you look around before you say hello to me. Guess what, Blaine? Everyone knows we're dating. The world won't implode just because two guys hold hands." He hesitated for just a moment before adding, "And I have call backs today for 'Jesus Christ Superstar.'"

"Kurt –" As soon as Kurt finished talking he'd turned and walked away, leaving Blaine standing alone in the hall.

Kurt avoided Blaine for the rest of the day, glad for once that they were in different grades and therefore different classes. Lunch was harder, but Kurt was good at making himself scarce. He'd spent years avoiding bullies, after all. He never thought he'd have to put that skill to use avoiding his boyfriend. Besides, with the knowledge of what he was going to do later was enough to effectively kill his appetite.

As soon as the last bell of the day rang, he all but ran to his car. He turned his phone on long enough to call the garage and tell his dad he was going to be late, ignoring the text messages from Mercedes and Blaine. Burt wasn't happy about that he would be missing Friday night dinner, but when Kurt explained it was for college, he was willing to let it slide with the promise that Kurt would be there next week no matter what.

The drive seemed infinitely shorter than any other time he made it. Several times he thought about turning around and going home, but he couldn't seem to do anything other than keep driving. It wasn't until he pulled up to the community center that he realized what exactly he was planning on doing. And then he remembered Blaine pulling away his hand and the anger flared again and he slammed the door to the car and walked confidently in to the building.

"Well, hello Kurt." The door to Wesley's office was open, eliminating Kurt's option of leaving at the last minute. "I'm glad you're here."

"Yeah," Kurt said, walking in slowly. Wesley stood up, closing the door behind Kurt which made him jump and turn around. When he did, the older man was standing right behind him, looking down with an expression that terrified Kurt.

"Can I get you anything?" Kurt tried to talk but there was a lump in his throat.

"Maybe I should go," He said, barely above a whisper. When he backed up, he found himself against the desk. He'd miscalculated the size of the office.

"Relax, Kurt," Wesley said, an easy smile on his face even as he took another step towards Kurt. "We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with."

The words were accompanied by a hand reaching out and resting on Kurt's shoulder, closing and holding him steady. Kurt was too terrified to move when Wesley leaned forward. He knew what was going to happen, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything to prevent it.

Wesley's lips were softer than Blaine's, Kurt thought ridiculously. Blaine constantly bit his lips, and kissing him was always rough, though Kurt had never minded it. Kurt forced himself to kiss back, responding mechanically. If his lack of passion bothers Wesley, the other man didn't show it as his hand started to wander down Kurt's chest, over his jacket and hooking in Kurt's pants.

"I think this was a mistake," Kurt said, regaining enough sensation back in his body to bring his hands up and set them on Wesley's chest, gently pushing him away. To Kurt's surprise, Wesley took a step back.

"You should leave, Kurt," Wesley said. "Obviously you aren't ready for such a big role, and it's better for you to figure out now that you're not cut out for the limelight."

"Wait. I'm sorry." Kurt wasn't sure what he was apologizing for, but even when Wesley stepped aside, he didn't walk towards the door. "I do want this. I…Please." He felt out of his depth, like the baby penguin that had become a joke between him and Blaine, as he took a few steps towards Wesley.

"Only if you're sure," Wesley said, making no move to get away, but not walking forwards either.

Kurt swallowed. "I am. I'm sure."

And then the lips were back, rougher this time. Kurt forced himself to respond, trying not to act as awkward as he felt. Kissing Wesley was different from Blaine. With Blaine he felt equal, but Wesley quickly dominated the kiss, moving from his lips to his neck to his jaw, the pressure either too rough to too light.

Kurt was almost able to detach when he felt Wesley's hand guide his, pressing it against the front of his pants. He hid his surprise, closing his eyes and imagining Blaine. It was impossible when he felt a rough hand on the back of his head, pressing him downwards. His knees locked, but he found himself forced to his knees. He didn't even spare a thought to what kneeling on the dirty floor would do to his new Versace pants.

"You're a dirty slut, aren't you?" Wesley's voice was low and his hand yanked Kurt's head back roughly. Kurt squeezed his eyes shut, whimpering in pain. "Suck me like the whore you are."

His head was shoved forwards, burying his nose in pubic hair. He cringed, but opened his mouth, engulfing the tip of Wesley's cock hesitantly. The hand never left his hair, forcing him to take the length further in his mouth. He gagged when it hit the back of his throat, but he wasn't given a chance to recover before he was pulled back and shoved forward again.

Eventually he shut off the rest of the world, ignoring Wesley's comments and the pain in his head and the blackness that was creeping in at the edges of his vision. It was a small relief that Wesley pulled out before he came, finishing himself in a few quick strokes while Kurt collapsed on the floor.

Kurt felt tears rise at the edge of his eyes, spilling over before he could do anything. He didn't care enough to wipe the tears away, clutching at the floor. He saw movement in his periphery and then Wesley was kneeling beside him, one arm around his shoulder to guide his head against the strong chest. The hand that had been pulling his hair moments before carded through his hair gently. He made soothing sounds until the sobs stopped shaking Kurt's body.

When he was sure he was done, he pulled away, wiping at his tears and his nose with the back of his hand until he felt a tissue thrust in his hand by Wesley.

"Thank you," He mumbled, cleaning himself up as best as he could.

"I trust that you'll keep this between us." It wasn't a question, but Kurt nodded. Wesley stood up, wiping his hands off on his pants and walking back to take a seat at his desk. "Then I'll see you every Friday. And practice starts tomorrow at 11."

Kurt didn't feel like he would be able to stand, but he forced himself to his feet. He stumbled out the door, stopping only when he made it outside the building. There was a bench outside the door that he collapsed on.

When he pulled out his phone, he saw he had only been in there for twenty minutes, thought in his mind it stretched to hours. He felt dirty, violated and all he wanted to do was go home and forget anything had ever happened. Maybe one day he could look back and see how this was necessary, how this had jumpstarted his record breaking career, though he would never tell anyone.

His fingers dialed the phone of their own violation and it wasn't until he heard the voice on the other line that he realized who he called. "Kurt? Is that you? I've been trying to talk to you all day. Are you okay?"

"Blaine," Kurt said, lifting a hand to his mouth to keep himself from sobbing in to the phone.

"I'm so sorry for earlier. You were absolutely right. About everything," Kurt tried to recall what had happened that morning, but it seemed like it was years instead of hours ago. He remembered they'd fought about something. God, he'd been so stupid. Blaine was still rambling but Kurt wasn't listening.

"I love you," He interrupted.

"I love you too, Kurt. I never want to mess this up." Kurt nearly lost it. Blaine was so perfect. It was Kurt who was messing everything up. "We're getting back early on Sunday afternoon. Can I come over?"

"That would be great. We can," He took a breath to keep control, "Go through the new Burberry catalogue. Do some early Christmas shopping?"

"Sounds perfect." Kurt heard someone talking to Blaine on the other end. "I have to go, Kurt. All the cousins are playing football and it's my turn to be captain. I'll call you tonight."

"Have fun and score some goals or whatever," Kurt chuckled. He would never understand the fascination with kicking a ball around a field.

"I know you were on the football team, so you know it's a touchdown."

"Oh. I got the part, by the way." He tried to make it sound casual.

"I knew you would! Congratulations." There were more voices that Kurt couldn't quite make out. "I love you so much, Kurt."

"Love you."

He stared blankly at his empty phone for several minutes until the image blurred in his sight. It wasn't until he felt tears fall down his cheeks that he realized he was crying. This would all be worth it in the end, but right now he felt like his world was crumbling down around him and there was nothing he could do to stop it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Warnings/Triggers: **None specifically, some Emotional Abuse.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

Kurt did his best to stay away from Wesley during practice the next morning, but it seemed like every time he turned around the director was beside him, finding an excuse to touch him. At first Kurt tensed each time the heavy hand rested on his shoulder. He molded easily when Wesley guided him to a new spot. When it became clear there was no ulterior motive, Kurt stopped resisting.

He still felt sick to his stomach when the rehearsal ended and Wesley asked him to stay after for a few minutes. Kurt toyed with the idea of running out with the rest of the cast, but… He needed this. The reality of standing on the stage, singing and acting, was so much better than he could ever have imagined. Without it…He couldn't even imagine being without it.

"How are you, Kurt?" Wesley was propped up on the back of a chair, hands resting casually on his knees. The expression in his eyes was impossible to read as Kurt approached him slowly.

"I'm fine," Kurt said automatically. He couldn't bring himself to ask how Wesley was.

"I have to admit I'm surprised you aren't trying harder, after I stuck my neck out for you." The words were a physical blow. Kurt thought he'd been doing well. Everyone had congratulated him after the practice, surprised when he said he was still in high school, but genuine. Maybe they had been lying?

"I…I'm sorry. I thought…"

"Don't worry about it. I know you won't disappoint me. But…I definitely think you could use extra help sessions." His tone was so casual it almost lulled Kurt into a sense of security. "Let's add Monday to the schedule, okay? And we can see how it goes from there."

Kurt hesitated in answering and Wesley latched on to that. "Unless you think I should find someone else?"

"No! No. Uh…I have to rearrange some things, but I can be here. I won't disappoint you."

"Oh, I have no doubt about that." Wesley hopped off the chair in one fluid motion, landing gracefully beside Kurt. He looked like a cat stalking a bird. Kurt couldn't get out of there fast enough.

xxx

He was nervous for Blaine to come over. It was a stupid fear. It was Blaine. Blaine! The boy he loved more than anything; the boy who loved him more than anything. The boy he was keeping a terrible secret from. And yet the idea of confessing was impossible. If he told Blaine, he knew Blaine would insist on telling someone else and then Kurt's dream would be gone.

"I can do this," He said to his reflection. "I'm Kurt Hummel, and I love Blaine Anderson. What he doesn't know won't hurt him, because I love him and this will all be in the past soon. We'll go to New York and become stars and be together forever."

He stood there, just looking at himself in the mirror. Despite his extensive skin cleansing ritual, he could see the beginning of bags under his eyes and frown lines from worry. He made a mental note to get a stronger moisturizer, since his current one obviously wasn't working. When there was a knock on the door, he nearly jumped out of his skin.

"Hey Blaine," Kurt said, opening the door and leaning forward for a kiss. It was quick, chaste, and Blaine slid in past Kurt when they broke apart.

"So, I brought the catalogues, and some Mountain Dew." Kurt smiled at his boyfriend's enthusiasm and followed him in through to the living room. He had set out a fruit tray and pita and hummus. While Blaine sat down and got out the magazines, Kurt grabbed a few Champaign glasses for the drinks and forced himself to put on a smile.

"How can you even think Burberry socks are a bad idea?" They'd been sitting there long enough for all the snacks to be gone. So far they'd picked out presents for most of their friends, but then Blaine had started teasing the socks Kurt was planning on getting, and he snapped. "This coming from the idiot who wears pants that don't cover his ankles and bowties. Seriously, Blaine?"

"Well it's not like your fashion choices are so stunning either." Blaine said. Kurt could tell he instantly regretted it, but he wasn't going to give his boyfriend a chance to apologize. He was already on his feet, storming to the door.

"I think you need to leave, Blaine." When it looked like Blaine was going to argue, Kurt pointed out the door, one hand on his hip for emphasis. "Now." Blaine walked past him, eyes questioning and apologizing at the same time. Kurt didn't say anything, trying to keep his expression hard when he was breaking to pieces inside.

Kurt watched the lights go down the driveway with growing horror. When the tail lights disappeared around the corner, he let himself fall apart, slumping against the wall and wrapping his arms around his body as tightly as possible. When soft sobs started to wrack his body, he bit his knuckles to stifle them. By the time anyone got home, he had pulled himself together and cleaned up the living room, leaving no trace Blaine had even been there.


End file.
